


Duty, Desire or Love?

by Damdamfino



Category: Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Arranged Marriage, F/M, Post-Canon, Pregnancy, Pregnant Sex, Prompt Fic, Prompt Fill, Tumblr Prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-19
Updated: 2018-01-19
Packaged: 2019-03-06 01:36:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,421
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13400697
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Damdamfino/pseuds/Damdamfino
Summary: Sansa’s duty as Queen is to give the King an heir. But what if that is the only reason Jon is so gentle and caring to her? Would everything change if she told him she was with child? What if she wanted to pretend...for just a little longer.[Prompt submitted by Amymel.]





	Duty, Desire or Love?

**Author's Note:**

> “How about they married for political reasons and that good ‘making an heir’ stuff happens - Sansa suspects that she is indeed pregnant but she keeps it from Jon because she for once enjoys the intimacy of being with someone gentle even if she’s convinced he’s only doing it out of duty and not desire and love (which of course he does - they’re just both oblivious dorks)“
> 
> I asked for prompts on my Tumblr and AmyMel sent this one. It was too adorable to not do. I can totally see Jon and Sansa tiptoeing around each other thinking they’re the only one who has feelings for the other.

She struggled to remain still as he lay beside her, pretending to be moments away from sleep. It never failed to surprise her when he would touch her lovingly every time he joined her in their marriage bed. A soft kiss to her crown. A cold nose nuzzled into the crease of her neck. A gentle caress down the length of her arm. Was it only a prelude to attempts at producing an heir? Or was it genuine?  
  
She felt his breathing behind her, slow and steady, as he draped his arm around her waist. His hand felt surprisingly warm as it slid across her stomach and found its nightly resting place. Panic quickly pricked at the edges of her mind. _Oh gods… did he know?_ Could he feel the slight bulge to her belly that had only just started? _No_ , she insisted silently. Men don’t notice those things. Especially not one as busy as Jon.  
  
Her King Husband. Wed to unite the kingdom and produce an heir to strengthen its hope. That was her duty. She was meant to unite forces and produce a prince. It had all happened so fast. It seemed as though only minutes after the wars and battles were over that the idea of marriage was thrust upon them so suddenly.  
  
Of course, Jon had accepted this requirement willingly. They had both accepted that this was expected of them. Those of royal or noble blood are not afforded the privilege of a marriage for love. Their marriage would be good for the kingdom. The Blood of the Dragons. The Daughter of the North. Their union and future heirs were important.  
  
Nevertheless, at first she was still afraid. To produce heirs one needed to consummate. Bedding had hurt her before. It had been horrible and made her feel powerless. So when it came time to share their bed, she was...less than eager. But Jon was kind, he was gentle, and he was patient.

After several weeks, she soon found herself longing for his touch. She wanted to get closer to him. But it seemed his affections were reserved for the privacy of their room. During the day his hands were still and far away. Mornings often consisted of conversations about her health and what foods she should eat. He was a King, and she a Queen. Nothing more.

But she wanted more. She had never longed for their nights together this much before. Not long after their first bedding she found herself looking forward to it. She anticipated every night when they would retire to their chambers. She had begun to drink in every caress. She finally knew what it mean to feel safe. There was something in the gentle way he touched her that spoke louder than before. He was never going to hurt her. She had never felt so sure of that ever before.

She never wanted that feeling to go away. So when she first suspected that she might be with child, she began to worry. Would his touches stop once she revealed the news? Would he consider his duty fulfilled? Would he finally move on to another? She dreaded the thought. His touches had become a blissful haven to her now. What at first had started as business-like interactions had turned into heavenly moments after dark. She desperately did not want this feeling to go away.

As if on cue, Jon pressed a kiss into her hair. Smiling to herself in the dark she rolled over in the bed to face him. Even though he was only performing his duty he had no trouble showing affection. Sansa wondered if this is what it was like for everyone - or was it only them?

His hands started to roam her body, sliding under her thin linen shift to raise it above her waist. Quickly she moved to grab the hem herself - to stop his hands from sliding over the slight bump of her stomach. He didn’t seem to notice her insistence and gratefully cupped her bare breast in his hand as he continued to kiss her neck. A sharp intake of air hissed through her teeth at his touch, her swollen breast much more sensitive than it used to be. This was going to prove more difficult than she thought.

At first she had tried to deny it to herself. If only she could deny it long enough - just long enough to enjoy his sweetness a little longer. Her fluttering stomach was only the result of some spoiled sweet milk. Her sore breasts were a result of the cold weather. She was not pregnant.

But she knew that was not true. Her moonblood had not come for two moons now. Her breasts were swollen and tender. She had to be with child. If Jon had noticed the changes he did not say so, but his hands seemed to know. His touch felt electric against her nipples now, unlike anything she had ever experienced before. The slightest graze could set her skin on fire.

If she kept this from him any longer, perhaps he would be forced to leave her. The kingdom would believe her barren, or even ruined by Lord Bolton. She had never produced heirs with her other husbands. Everyone would think her womb was infertile. Then where would she be?

Sansa tried to ignore the small nagging thoughts in the back of her mind and reached to drag her fingers through Jon’s hair. In one swift motion he pushed himself up to completely hover over her body as his lips continued to travel down her chest. She felt so content here. Her hands explored the definition of his arms, slowly and tantalizingly making their way to the arch of his back. His lips were so soft, so gentle. Suddenly Jon took her sensitive nipple into his mouth and a loud gasp ripped out of her throat. He had never done that before.

He stopped, drawing back to meet her eye. “I’m sorry,” he said, his brow wilted into a look of concern she had not seen in weeks. “Did I hurt you?”

“No,” she insisted. Perhaps ignoring it would keep her from having to ruin this moment. _Please don’t make me say it._ “No. I was merely surprised.”

Jon seemed hesitant to accept her answer, so she leaned up to kiss him to reassure him. He returned the kiss happily, deciding to continue on with his duties. His free hand went back to cupping her breast, kneading it as his kiss grew deeper. Sansa tried to ignore the dull throbbing from each of his squeezes.

_Why the sudden obsession towards my breasts?_ she wondered. _Please, leave them be. They have not slighted you._

Sansa‘s mind could not quiet. She struggled to focus on the moment and not the worries in her head. Jon shifted, as he had many times before, to position himself on top of her. Most of his weight rested on her, pushing them so close together they might as well be one body. He had pressed on her like this before but, for some reason, it bothered her tonight. So much pressure against her abdomen must be bad. She tapped her fingers against Jon’s hips, distracting him from his goal.

“Can you lift up a little?” She asked innocently. Jon did, leaning up and away from her body quickly, but not without a long, steady glance.

“Are you feeling well?” he asked.

“I’m fine,” she responded quickly, her voice higher than usual. He only stared. “I swear,” she added.

Perhaps a change in position would help. She grabbed his arm, pulling him down beside her and she threw a leg over his lap. His eyes watched her warily as she stretched back, lengthening her chest in front of him to settle more comfortably. A small moan growled out of his throat as he slid his hand gently up her stomach and up to her fully exposed breasts. She had never straddled him like this before - one didn’t need to to finish the deed - and he seemed to pause a moment to drink her in.

Her mind would not stop. Could he see now? Could he see the curve of her belly or the slight growth of her breasts? Even she could tell her nipples were darker in the low light. Jon growled again, reaching for her breasts with both hands now. He must see. There was no way he couldn’t. The way his hands cupped her, it was as if he was testing for size. Then, he squeezed.

The sound came out before she could stop it. A small and curt, “Ow.”

Immediately he spat out, “What is wrong?”

“Nothing!”

“We don’t have to do this tonight,” he said, obviously not believing her. He pulled his hands away and for a moment she wanted to grab them and place them forcibly on her. _Please, don’t leave_ , she silently pleaded. This is what she had feared.

“I’m fine,” Sansa said. She grabbed his hands and held them tightly in her own. “I swear. I can do this.”

“You’re not.” His hands slipped out of hers and he firmly placed them by his sides. Sansa refused to move - to do so would accept defeat. She desperately wanted to feel his hands again, to have him kiss her gently again, but her body had betrayed her. Jon’s eyes grew dark at her silence, and he spoke up, almost as an afterthought. “We can try tomorrow. I’m sorry if I upset you. I won’t do it again. I promise.”

Her mind screamed. That was the opposite of what she wanted. Somehow she had managed to fuck it all up anyway. “Jon…” she sighed. _Oh gods…_ She closed her eyes and took in a deep shaky breath. She couldn’t avoid this any longer. “It was not you. I...I think I may already be pregnant.”

His body tensed under her. This was it. Her duty had been done. He had no reason to come to her bed anymore.

“...really?” she heard him breathe behind her eyelids.

She did not dare open her eyes to meet her fate. She could only faintly nod her head in response. She knew she should be happy. An heir was good news. She was going to have a child with him. So why did the admission fill her with dread?

His voice was guarded. “How long?”

“I’m not sure.” Her voice was so small and weak. She found it nearly impossible to say the words out loud. “One month? Maybe two. I haven’t spoken with the Maester yet.”

“Why did you not tell me?”

There was a small crack in his voice that gave him away. He was hurt. Sansa blinked her eyes open to meet his, and suddenly she felt horrible. His hands were on her hips now, and she rose and fell slightly with his quickened breaths. She fumbled awkwardly with her hair, tucking it behind her ears to give her hands something to do.

If she thought telling him about the pregnancy was hard, this was a million ways worse. _Just say it!_ “I...I didn’t want this to end.” His eyes flashed wide for a moment. She continued on, rambling quickly. “I know this was why we married. I know that. And I know that now you can focus on other things - other...people. I understand that you don’t have to do pretend anymore. But, Jon...sometimes I wish it weren’t so.”

His silence bothered her. He only watched as she confessed her one-sided affection while straddled naked over his lap. She might regret this in the morning. She might regret this for the rest of her married life. But damn if she wasn’t about to lose him anyway. “I know you’re only being kind to me for my title. I know that giving you an heir is my duty. I know you didn’t want this. But these last few months have made me happy. You’ve been so kind to me...and I didn’t want that to end just yet.”

“You thought I was only being kind for an heir?” Jon interrupted.

“Or, you know…” Sansa mumbled, gesturing vaguely at herself. “Other reasons.”

Jon’s quizzical face slowly erupted into a full throated laugh. He was mocking her torment. _Great._ Sansa rolled her eyes and moved to get off him, but he grabbed her wrist to keep her still.

“No, Sansa,” he whispered, his eyes still twinkling from laughter. “I wasn’t pretending.” He raised himself to sit so that their chests were almost touching. “I thought you were.” Carefully he reached a hand up and tangled it in her hair, gently cradling her head in his palm. “I was never pretending.” And with that, he claimed her lips.

Every nerve ending on her body exploded in relief. All of her worrying had been for nothing. He wasn’t going to leave. They had both been fools. Suddenly every touch, every glance, every sweet word fell into place like bricks in her mind.

Sansa struggled to keep the tears of relief from falling. Jon broke from the kiss to lean his forehead against hers, and his hand swept across her back. “I would never abandon you,” he reassured her softly. “You’re my Queen.” She couldn’t hold in the grateful scoff that hiccuped out of her chest. Hearing him say it, hearing him confess what she had longed to be true for weeks now, overwhelmed her. Then Jon, as if to break the tension between them, caught her eye to add excitedly, “And you’re pregnant!”

“I’m pregnant,” she repeated with a nod.

“With a little lord.”

“Or a lady.”

“Aye,” he laughed again. “Or lady.”

“That’s why I was acting so strange,” she tried to explain. “My breasts are suddenly extremely tender. It comes with a child, I’m told.” Jon suddenly got a devilish glint in his eye.

“Like this?” He softly pinched her nipple between his thumb and forefinger. She gasped and recoiled from the shock.

“Yes!”

“And this?” He asked coyly and leaned down to flick his tongue across her nipple. She squealed and batted his arm.

“Yes! Stop it. They really hurt.”

“Alright,” he chuckled. His breath warmed her skin with every puff of air. He started to kiss her gently along her skin, leaving softly pecked kisses in trails between one breast and the other. His arms wrapped around her and he drew her to his chest once again. “I’ll leave them be...for now.”


End file.
